 |  Window boxes and shutters. Beautiful cladding. A bright and cozy interior to work, play and cuddle with Indigo in. |  |
What keeps me going is seeing the finished project dangling in front of me like the proverbial carrot. I've watched so many videos of men, women and a teen saying they had no previous building experience and they Did It! They inspired me to believe that I could do it, too. Little was I prepared though, how tough I would find this experience to be. Even though I have wonderful, knowledgeable friends who always have an ear for me, tips how to do stuff and tools to lend me some practical help as well. Truth is I have been feeling quite alone in this. I'm challenged physically, nothing takes under 2 hours and even simple jobs turn out to be painful. For example having returned Kai's hammer stapler before I was completely done with tar-papering. I went to use my ordinary hand stapler, harder on one's hands and near impossible at angles I couldn't get my weight behind. That would have been OK though had the thing not been jinxed to jam after every couple of staples. The job took twice as long, emotions ran high and exhaustion with all of it not far behind.
How important it is TO BE NICE TO YOUR SELF! How often is it that we lament the lack of support and help and usually it is we who pull the plug on our selves first in that regard. Whether it is thoughts like 'I suck' or 'Why do I have so little help, there must be something wrong with me'.
Times have changed. I am learning to love myself through adversity. Be nice to myself. Instead of throwing the stapler of the roof that I'm sitting on, and rather than to scream insults and to blame or judge, I remember to give myself a hug, breathe long and deep and tell myself 'I'm sorry you have to experience this being so hard' and 'You are doing a great job!' The harder it is the more I compliment and praise myself for every accomplishment -- however little it may be.
Even if it doesn't sound or feel like it at the time, I do embrace this challenge. It's a huge learning curve and opportunity to practice and incorporate new spiritual knowledge.
I am about to start dry walling. Another step closer to furnishing and decorating. :)
How important it is TO BE NICE TO YOUR SELF! How often is it that we lament the lack of support and help and usually it is we who pull the plug on our selves first in that regard. Whether it is thoughts like 'I suck' or 'Why do I have so little help, there must be something wrong with me'.
Times have changed. I am learning to love myself through adversity. Be nice to myself. Instead of throwing the stapler of the roof that I'm sitting on, and rather than to scream insults and to blame or judge, I remember to give myself a hug, breathe long and deep and tell myself 'I'm sorry you have to experience this being so hard' and 'You are doing a great job!' The harder it is the more I compliment and praise myself for every accomplishment -- however little it may be.
Even if it doesn't sound or feel like it at the time, I do embrace this challenge. It's a huge learning curve and opportunity to practice and incorporate new spiritual knowledge.
I am about to start dry walling. Another step closer to furnishing and decorating. :)
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